The Morralls

In Warwick Record Office are the papers of Father John A. Morrall, O.S.B., dated about 1906. Among them is a story contributed by Michael Morrall of Matlock, a stonemason, some of whose work may be seen in the Catholic cemetery at Studley. The story, in essence, is as follows.

In the reign of George II (1727 1760) a younger son of a sturdy English Catholic yeoman learned ‘the art and mystery’ of barber-surgery He married into an old Catholic family and commenced business in a certain town in one of the Midland counties of England. ( Ed.- Alcester) He was, in due course,called on by the parish clerk for what are called ‘Easter dues’. The barber surgeon refused to pay and so the Parson himself called and said Why do you object?’. The barber-surgeon answered, ‘I never attend your church’. The parson replied ‘That is your own fault; you ought to attend’. Barber surgeon ‘You know I go to chapel’. ‘That is also your own fault’ said the parson, ‘the church is open to all and my curate and I are there to conduct the service’. The barber said ‘I have now an engagement at the Hall (Ed.- Ragley Hall) to bleed the Marquis and Sir.John wants a new wig; but I’ll think over the matter’.

The Parson was not long in receiving a bill from the barber for a Quarter’s attendance which, in addition to shaving and hair cutting included charges for making wigs, bleeding and cupping, drawing teeth and dressing the parson’s bad leg: so that a respectable bill was mMde out The parson was not slow to call on the Catholic barber for an explanation. ‘Why’, he said, ‘you have never done anything for me’s ‘That’s your fault’, replied the barber I and my apprentices are here at your service’. ‘But you know that I am attended to by another barber who is a churchman’. The barber answered ‘You ought to come to me, everybody ought: it is their own fault if they don’t and no reason, according to your own argument, why you should not pay the bill I sent your.

Winter 1985 Index