Booking a Morris Side

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You Want to Book a Morris Side?

Well, I may be able to help. I know a fair number of sides in the UK and a few in the US and can find addresses and contacts for a lot more. Alternatively, you might want to try one of the organisations listed at the bottom.

Be aware, however, if you've come to the page especially for that purpose, that most sides are fully committed for the whole of the summer by about the end of February. If you need to find Morris dancers in a hurry, I might be able to help if you mail me, but I can't make any guarantees.

Other than the invitations one side will extend to another, most Morris sides are used to taking bookings for things like church fetes or to provide entertainment in a shopping centre. Media bookings are different - here are a few notes based on personal experience.

How Morris Sides Work - for Media People

Media people who want to book Morris dancers may not be aware of how Morris sides work. The dancers are amateurs, and unlike fledgling bands they mostly have no real desire to be anything else. This means that any publicity is likely to benefit the Morris as a whole, rather than the individuals who are giving their time. And most of us have day jobs like teaching and computer consultancy. This means that deciding on Tuesday that you want dancers for three in the afternoon on Thursday may be a tad unrealistic.

To put on a worthwhile show, I need to persuade at least eight people, probably more, to take half a day off work. That may simply not be possible. And even if it is, bear in mind that collectively we'll be losing many hundreds of pounds of salary. Think how much it would take to persuade you to give up a half-day's pay, and then, please, bear with us if sides don't get back to you, or can't make it.

It's just that we don't do this full time. If you phone me at home and leave a message, I have to deal with it after I've finished my day's work. If you manage to get my mobile number from someone (I may kill them), and I'm not in a meeting, I'm in the same boat - I'll need to contact my team and most of them will be at work as well. I still can't deal with it before the evening. There are some sides (we normally prefer to be called "sides" - just humour us) who have agents, or who may be able to field a group at a very few days notice: try me or look for a contact from the list at the bottom, and someone will try to sort something out. But try is all I can promise.

Also please remember that, again unlike a performing band, most Morris musicians and dancers are unused to performing under lights or to microphones. The fact that they may need advice doesn't mean that they're not good at what they do, simply that they're in an unfamiliar environment. No-one responds well to being treated like an imbecile for not knowing the dynamic response of a "hand-grenade". In addition, the dance and music have a fairly intimate relationship. Asking a musician to play without being able to see the dancers, or from a distance using a radio-mike which is played through speakers with a time delay before the dancers hear, is likely to lead to serious problems. Ask before standing between the musicians and the dancers, for instance.

A word about contacts. There's probably only one contact address or number for the side. That's easy, then. But if there are multiple contacts they may have funny titles - which one to call? Well, the straight answer is whoever happens to be in. But apart from that, well, "squire" approximates to chairman: "bag" or "bagman" is often the treasurer and also the secretary. "fore" or "foreman" is normally the dance director. If all three are quoted, the "bag" is the one to try first as a contact. At a performance, ask to be introduced to the "squire" who will usually turn out to be the one in charge. Silly names? Sure - but how many people outside the film industry know what a "best boy" does?

What Media People Need - for Morris People

Having said which, Morris people are often their own worst enemy when it comes to media events. We seem to forget that the television crew have a job to do: just because we've taken the afternoon off and therefore have four hours to kill doesn't mean that the sound-man does.

Morris standard time is a standing joke in the Morris world. It's a complete pain in the proverbial to anyone trying to work with us. If your sound-check is at 2:17, that's when they're expecting it to be and having one person still in the bar is likely to lead to tears before bed-time. It's a confidence builder to be there ahead of time so that if there's slack in the schedule you can fill it.

The reverse is not true. If we've agreed to be available for four hours, then treat that as you would a contractual agreement at work. If the schedule runs late, sound checks or takes may be repeatedly delayed, stood down and called again at a moment's notice. This is the world of which you have agreed to be a part. Normally the people involved are fairly accommodating of amateurs but they really shouldn't need to be. If we agreed to be there, that's where we should be. Take a paperback which can be read in short snatches, grit your teeth and above all be quiet.

How long does the programme run? If the scenario requires one minute and thirty, seconds, can you oblige? Does the time include or exclude getting on and off? I know that there are sides who can "hit the mark" to within a few seconds on each occasion, but if you haven't given it any thought, the time to do so is before-hand, not on the day. The same principle applies to announcements and even written statements: Think about the points you want to make, in advance. In print, 200 words of spell- checked, grammatical English that makes a strong point, submitted when 200 words is what is required, may just make you the hero of the hour. A rambling hand-written note which is over-length may require so much effort to make it printable that it is simply dropped. The same principle applies with a "Piece to Camera". The standard advice is "ABC, XYZ" - "Always Be Concise, Examine Your Zip." And if you aren't confident, ask for a run-through beforehand. Never be afraid to ask dumb questions, it always less embarrassing than making dumb mistakes.

Of course, if we did more of these things when performing at pubs or garden fetes, it might just be that fewer people would treat us as some kind of joke.

I'm available as a scratch Recorder player, for Barmitzvahs, sound-bites and Women's Institutes, or to run workshops on Border Morris. You can mail me at home - use the nospam mailer from the top left or from the foopter of this page.

Here are some useful web contacts for other organisations:

...and some links to other parts of my site which you may find of interest: